So for the past couple days I have really been researching, reading, listening to anything I can get a hold of concerning sex trafficking. The more I found the more enraged I became, how could someone do this to someone else? I really just can't wrap my mind around it, not that I want to. All this rage lead to awful thoughts, I began to murder these abusers in my mind. Oh how I wished that I could inflict the pain and more on them that they did to someone else. I knew that the way I was feeling was wrong but was doing little to change my attitude. I was just so upset, these victims are being violated and they deserve justice right?! And then I started to express my feelings to others as I was talking to them about this crime and the violence that occurs, to which most of them agreed with me. I just kept thinking I better never be in the presence of one of those abusers I might seriously try to take them out....
OH but then it happened. I am driving home and I am praying. I start to pray about my attitude, knowing it is wrong and pleading with God to help change it. The more I pray the more things that come to mind.
1st These abusers are TOTALLY DEPRAVED people who don't know God, they are like I was before God saved me....
2nd The Devil has a hold of their heart, like he tries to do to me everyday. It is only the grace of God each day that I can fight off some of the demons in my life.
3rd They may have physically murdered someone or abused them, but I just did it in my mind... so really we are still on the same playing ground
4th We both struggle with temptations, we both give in to temptations that we should not.
5th They think of themselves above others, better than some, deserving of what they are taking from others. I judge, I judged them. I must think I am better than them if I think they deserve all those wretched things I wanted to do to them. It is a natural tendency for me to take glory away from God to bring it to myself.
6th They use others to make themselves feel better, more important.... Ok how many of us at some point have not used others to make ourselves feel better? (whether a vicious mindset or not)
7th They sin, I Sin
Do you see where I am going with this, I am absolutely no better than they are. The ONLY thing that sets me apart from them is God. GOD! They don't know the God I know, they don't serve Him, worship Him, love Him....
We are both sinners, in desperate need of salvation that can only occur through Christ our Savior.
I then began to feel so desperate to talk to them to share with them Christ. They need to know Him, they need Him, they are totally depraved without Him. There is no reason AT ALL that I should desire that these abusers receive cruel treatment... I am no better than these them, BUT because of Christ, His work, a loving Father, and the guidance of the Spirit, I AM SAVED! We both deserve hell, they need to hear the great news of the gospel. I need to witness the love of Christ to them, not prove the devil right by murdering them or torturing them (even if it is only in my mind).
You see simply said we are the same... we are only different if we are following and serving Christ.
I don't want to miss out on an opprotunity to share my joy, my Christ, my God with someone. You never know how God may use you. You may not see directly the fruit displayed, but you could plant a seed that will bloom.
Please join me in prayer for these abusers. They need Christ. Do I think they need punishment for their deeds OH YEAH, but no matter what God will take care of it, he doesn't need my help in that department.
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